“Keep on tossing those
pages, friend,” he thought. “I’ll clean up after
you. Heh heh. What a team. . . .” (From chapter 3)
On a September day in 1969, the poet Allen
Ginsberg visited the campus where I was a sophomore English major.
I was also a full-time reporter so I talked my editor into letting
me cover his visit to classes and his evening public lecture. As
he prepared for his afternoon presentation, I asked him if he’d
pose for a picture. “I never pose for pictures,” he said
quietly but firmly. I nodded, disappointed. But he did sit down and
began fooling with his instruments and I realized he was doing it
for me, this green kid reporter who was in awe of him.
Later, I followed him and an English professor up
the sidewalk to the building where the English classes were taught.
They were talking about poetry and the death of his friend Jack Kerouac.
I was maybe five steps behind. As Ginsberg carried on the conversation
he let out a long fart. He did it casually as if it were as natural
as breathing, which it is. We spend our lives trying to hide our
farts (unless you’re a group of guys and then everyone farts
as loud as the force of the wind allows). Ginsberg simply paid no
attention to it.
That one casual fart transformed him from the god
I’d made him as I read
Howl and other poems, to a living, breathing, farting human being. Good lesson.
That was the first insight. The second was: don’t walk five steps behind
a guy who has gas. Even if he is Allen Ginsberg.
During those years, I devoured everything by Kerouac, Ginsberg,
Gregory Corso, along with Blake, Shelly, Wordsworth, and all
the literature classes I was getting in school.
Like a lot of others, I was also into Tolkein’s
The Ring Trilogy.
I was also covering fires, accidents, meetings and writing features.
By the end of my sophomore year, I was flunking out of college.
I begged a gym teacher to bump me up one letter grade. He did.
My French professor asked me during a final if I was going to
take anymore French which was going very badly for me. I said
no.
“Good,” she said. “If you promise never to take French again,
I’ll pass you.”
So, with a B in gym which I didn’t earn and a D in French which I bought
with a promise, I stayed in school.